Saturday, November 9, 2013

What It Isn't

Way back when, the day I'd injured myself and I was sitting in the ER (which seems like a hundred years ago but was really only 6 weeks or so) the ER doctor told me, "We might not be able to find out what it is that caused you to pass out, but we can find out what it isn't."

In the ER I had a list of isn'ts:  it isn't a heart attack, or a stroke, or low or high blood pressure, or some weird cardiac episode, or low or high blood sugar.  That's all very good news.  I'd rather not have any of those things.

But I still wanted to know what it is.  So I went to my regular doctor, and she ordered more bloodwork, because I couldn't remember if I'd eaten the day I took the header into the corner cabinet and the door jamb, and some things are better measured after fasting.  And now I have another list of isn'ts:  it still isn't low or high blood sugar, or thyroid, or a weird hormonal thing.  (I was wondering if maybe it was some monster hot flash that felled me.)

In other news, I visited the orthopedic surgeon a couple of weeks ago (and got to see the nice Family Nurse Practitioner rather than the not-nice surgeon) and found out that my collarbone is knitting together, but the ends of the break are overlapping rather than being side by side.  The overlap isn't much and he said it can heal that way, but to keep it from getting worse I had to further limit my movement.  So, I've been reading a lot lately, and I've watched more television in the past six weeks than I have in the past six months.  (Is it just me, or are the same shows on every night?)  I'm still in the awful figure-of-eight splint, but apparently the thing does help.  I'm still off work until I go back to the ortho on the 18th and I'm really hoping he releases me to go back to work then.  

So we still don't know what it is, but I'm inclined to go along with my doctor's theory.  She thinks that because I was arguing with Mare just before I whacked my head that maybe I was so angry and frustrated with him (gee, you'd think she knows him) that I might've had an episode of vasovagal syncope.  In plain language, that means he pissed me off to the point that I lost consciousness.  This is not difficult for me to believe.  Usually when he makes me angry I throw a hammer at him, but I didn't have one that day.  I'll have one close at hand from now on.  Better he should get hit with a hammer than I should break another bone. 

8 comments:

  1. So basically they said you had a case of the 'vapors' because Mare pissed you off?

    Kudos to you for enduring that shoulder splint. I would be a real b**ch. Will you need therapy for your shoulder after you heal?

    I agree about TV. The more channels available means that there are more channels to air the same old crap. I only have a handful of shows that I really love to watch. Big Bang, Prospectors on TWC, and the Gem Hunters on the Travel channel. I used to love HGTV but I cannot handle the shows where first time buyers are whining about their first house not having granite etc. AND who's first house is a 500K mansion?

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    1. The vapors! LOL. Yes, that's exactly it.

      We like the same tv shows. I also like Once Upon A Time and American Pickers, and I'm embarrassed to admit that my son got me hooked on The Walking Dead. I agree with you about. HGTV. I used to love it, by most of the shows are annoying now.

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    2. Oh I forgot about Pickers. I used to watch Storage Wars but it's absurd about the value of items. I also forgot Antique Roadshow.

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  2. LMAO at Jan's comment. Yes the TV options suck. Ready any good books? I'm right there with you in not adjusting well to being laid up.

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    1. I've read Turning Angel by Greg Iles and liked it, but not as much as some of his other books. The Quiet Game is my favorite book of his. I also read Achieve The Honorable, Congressman Ike Skelton's memoir, which was bittersweet because he passed away last week. I'm reading The Brethren by John Grisham now. In between those I've read Rolling Stone, Southern Living, The Atlantic, Smithsonian, and National Geographic magazines.

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  3. Throwing hammers is MUCH better than getting pissed to the point of passing out. If that happened to me, people would start to think I had a severe case of narcolepsy...
    I don't know if it's on NOW...but I got hooked on Flea Market Flip for a while. Half the time I was yelling at the TV because they trashed an antique, but some of the rest of the stuff was pretty cool. (Storing those ideas for the next neighborhood yard sale when I have to "upcycle" our "treasures"...) Happy healing!

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  4. Yes. TV options seriously suck! Glad you are getting better and that you have many "isn'ts" to cross off your list. Definitely keep that hammer handy. We can't have you going through this kind of crap EVER again. :-)

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  5. Counting on my fingers, you have a month to go? How's it doing?

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